The dream of having children is something very common among couples, but does everyone know what changes in the couple’s life after the children? And the answer is simple: everything changes! Even if you have planned this moment for years, your whole routine will change. But it is worth going through this very special moment and experiencing this unconditional and emotionally charged love.
The arrival of the baby in the couple’s life causes some changes in the marriage , and all the attention becomes the little one and the care will be redoubled for him, with that the couple must go through a period of adaptation to this new situation.
Even if the arrival of your baby has been planned, it is normal for the couple’s relationship to be affected, according to a statement by some psychologists, the satisfaction rate with the wedding tends to decrease during the first year with the arrival of the baby.
The conflicts in this period also increase enormously, the emotional and physical issue is also affected. With the arrival of a baby in the couple’s life , the two begin to feel emotions of incomprehension, often lonely and feel ignored without time for each other.
At this moment, there is a need for the couple to communicate, to dialogue with each other, to put out their feelings, fears, sadness and anxiety. Over time, work with the child will decrease and the couple will have more time to plan and manage their time together.
Soon everything is molded in the relationship of the couple and the social life that was the two becomes three and everything starts to revolve around the routine of the Baby. A new opportunity to make friends and participate in children’s events , you get to be part of the daddy’s club.
Now the priorities are different and revolves around the child. The important thing is to embrace these opportunities with joy, assuming this new phase, everything may have changed, but face it with love and do not keep returning to it before the baby arrives.
Adaptation of the Couple with the Arrival of a Baby
With the arrival of the baby, the parents still do not know very well what to do and how to manage this new phase, being more difficult to do simple things like talking to each other or sleeping together, just the two, there is no more time for both, now the concern of both becomes of the son.
This change is also felt in relation to the couple’s sex , it is no longer so free and sometimes also decreases, now there has to be a plan even for this moment. It usually happens when the child sleeps and also has another villain, tiredness after a busy day of care with the little one.
Prepare for this new phase
In the child’s first year of life, the couple has to deprive themselves of many things they did, and adapt to this moment. The couple should learn to say no to the social life they have had for at least some time.
- At this first moment with the arrival of the baby, it is common to reject invitations to parties, parties and dinners. After all, the priority is now the baby.
- The couple will do less romantic strolls.
- All care is now for the baby, so having sex decreases a lot.
- The right thing is to put a person to help take care of the child, so you can share
your attention with the baby and the husband.
The change is radical and many moms say that they look like single mothers, but married and feel overwhelmed with the tasks that end up being for them. At this moment, it is good to talk to the husband so that he can share the tasks with the little one, time for changing , bathing , sleeping, helping with food, so that both of them will have more time to talk.
Couple with Children Restart or End of Relationship?
This moment of the baby’s arrival is of great expectation, a very special moment in the couple’s life, but the changes and the new adaptation are difficult. For everything to work out it is important for the couple to get together, even if the day-to-day task with the child is busy and requires mom and dad as much time as possible.
The couple should share the daily tasks , if it is possible it is good to find a person who helps to take care of the child so that there will be more time for both of them. That way they will have time to look at each other and do things they used to do before the child arrived.
To keep the relationship healthy, the couple has to pay attention to each other , mom has to get ready, do hair, nails, read a book, talk to a friend and, over time, resume her social life, of course that this change will now also be the arrival of the baby is extended.
Dad also has to share his time with his family, but do the things he likes, for example, listening to music, arranging dinners to receive friends and planning trips. The good thing is to keep in mind that the adaptation period with the increase of the family, should be seen as a new experience.
With a lot of dialogue, companionship together with the responsibility of both, it is possible to face new experiences and tasks and still strengthen the relationship. But unfortunately many couples split up for not knowing how to face or adapt to this moment. In this case, it is good to go and look for a specialist to help control the stress and insecurity of this new phase.
My name is Dr. Alexis Hart I am 38 years old, I am the mother of 3 beautiful children! Different ages, different phases 16 years, 12 years and 7 years. In love with motherhood since always, I found it difficult to make my dreams come true, and also some more after I was already a mother.
Since I imagined myself as a mother, in my thoughts everything seemed to be much easier and simpler than it really was, I expected to get pregnant as soon as I wished, but it wasn’t that simple. The first pregnancy was smooth, but my daughter’s birth was very troubled. Joana was born in 2002 with a weight of 2930kg and 45cm, from a very peaceful cesarean delivery but she had already been born with congenital pneumonia due to a broken bag not treated with antibiotics even before delivery.