One of the most discussed points among parents, teachers and child behavior specialists is the question of the correction of parents and their caregivers and the way they are applied. Like “spanking”, verbal aggression with children is a topic that scares and even today, due to the number of children affected by this occurrence.
According to psychologists, verbal aggression with children is pointed out as a form of mistreatment and is even more painful than the famous spanking , leaving deep marks on the psychological child. The famous phrase that says “ words hurt more than a spanking ” fits the theme perfectly.
Making clear the treatment they receive through their acts and living with others. Children who experience verbal aggression ask for help at all times through their behavior, which is almost always aggressive towards others, or rather, they give the world what they receive.
With the busy life of today’s parents, the education and care of children has increasingly become outsourced. Parents cannot always count on the help of trusted family members to help them, and they end up using babysitters or daycare centers. What is of utmost importance: getting to know the person well , having references and still being attentive to signs in the children’s behavior.
According to child researchers, offensive words that depreciate, diminish and neglect emotionally children directly affect their self-esteem, hindering their development and their relationship with the outside world and it is the worst aggression that exists, since no remedy has yet been created that cure heart pain.
Offenses and humiliations hurt the soul and as much as the aggressor forgets what was said, the wound has already opened up deeply. Apologies are almost never enough! Some parents or caregivers end up repeating the education and upbringing they had in their childhood. Even though it was painful in his time, he ends up forgetting what he felt and automatically repeating it as if it were something natural. Verbal and physical aggression will never be natural!
I went overboard with my son – what do I do?
Many parents, due to the heat of the moment, end up changing and exceeding in the tone of voice and unfortunately in the words said and end up saying many times what they do not feel. But how to explain to a child that by depreciating him, that was not quite what he meant? Or by offending her by comparing her to another child, who would not like to have said that? These are very common facts among parents and yes, many times we act without thinking about the consequences, after all, parents are also human beings.
The key point of the situation is to recognize the error and correct it! To err is human and to acknowledge and apologize is noble, but to change your method of dialogue with your child to a healthier way is to be wise. Children learn with affection, with dialogue, showing mistakes and directing them not to make the same mistakes again. So if you felt you went overboard and went overboard, apologize and say you didn’t mean it. Parents are the mirrors of their children and it is through examples that they will be taught!
Recognizing their mistake and changing the way they act is a great lesson for them. So scratch from your manual of correction and teaching verbal aggression. It is already proven, children who grew up in a loving and respectful home are better adults for the world and the offense is like a toxic product that affects and harms everyone around them. Now ask yourself: What kind of person do I want my child to be?
My name is Dr. Alexis Hart I am 38 years old, I am the mother of 3 beautiful children! Different ages, different phases 16 years, 12 years and 7 years. In love with motherhood since always, I found it difficult to make my dreams come true, and also some more after I was already a mother.
Since I imagined myself as a mother, in my thoughts everything seemed to be much easier and simpler than it really was, I expected to get pregnant as soon as I wished, but it wasn’t that simple. The first pregnancy was smooth, but my daughter’s birth was very troubled. Joana was born in 2002 with a weight of 2930kg and 45cm, from a very peaceful cesarean delivery but she had already been born with congenital pneumonia due to a broken bag not treated with antibiotics even before delivery.