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In a world where values are reversed and respect has become a rare part, such an ancient education tactic comes into question and even gains a law to strengthen it. If there is a subject that generates controversy, it is this: spanking educates or educates?
For some, spanking is a correction , a way for the parent to educate and show that the child is doing something wrong. For others, it is a prehistoric way of teaching and all they can do is teach violence to the young child in training. The controversy is divided into totally diverse opinions, ranging from those who are totally against any type of physical aggression, be it a slap on the buttocks or even a tug of the ear to those who are in favor of correction with a “slap on the butt”.
We got to the bottom of this question and asked the parents here at Changing Diapers. Before an educational intervention is needed, it needs a disagreement. It is interesting that parents and children disagree either frequently or rarely. About 52% of cases would have almost no major problems with children. On the other hand, another 31% would have problems several times a day with their children. The minority would have problems once a week and another 11% some friction with children once a day. So how do these parents manage to get around these situations?
How to Act as a Father or Mother?
Once they disagree, what can you do to get around the situation? While the traditional solution, spanking has not completely disappeared from the educational repertoire, it is clear that times have changed. The preference to resolve this type of situation is in non-violent ways. Their favorite is the change in the tone of voice. Showing a firmer tone signals the child that something is wrong. The most peaceful and explanatory conversation, which can even follow a change at once, is also one of the most chosen forms of solution. Dialogue is important to show right and wrong and also to exemplify situations. Most of the time, this process is best received by older children. However, with minors there may be difficulties in understanding. Regardless, it would have some effect, at least it shows tenderness when it comes to correcting a failure.
The famous “punishment” today is no longer found in families with young children. Parents adopted other ways of teaching children. Really taking benefits and objects, which children like a lot, can help in education, because then she would have a good reason to think about what she did “wrong”. Instead of depriving the son of something, he could even offer another. However, our interviewees were not very concerned about this alternative. For many parents, this would mean an educational defeat because they need to “buy” the child to do what they want. This can cause other problems in the future when the benefit needs to be increasing.
Finally the spanking! She, who by many is abhorred, still has time in Brazilian families. It is not that spanking for these parents means beating, but a way of drawing attention as a last resort. Some psychologists defend the thesis that children who suffer correction through spanking do not learn the lesson , managing to understand that they did something wrong but are afraid of their parents, afraid of the situation to repeat themselves, so they do not repeat the act again . What should be respect ends up becoming fear, is it?
Currently, the method of educating children is the basis of conversation , good dialogue and if you still don’t see results, punishment is applied. Children momentarily lose their video games, cell phones, games and the like in exchange for their bad behavior, aiming at seeing the mistake made. Some parents use the argument that they were raised with spanking and would be very grateful for the education. That is why they want to pass on the same teaching to their children. Others draw their conclusions and change their educational methods precisely because they do not accept the way they were corrected and punished in childhood, claiming that they were traumatized by it.
What the Law Says Regarding Spanking
Another great discussion related to the subject is about spanking limits. Is a slap on the butt less aggressive than an ear tug or a spanking? Aiming at the lack of control of these corrective spankings and seeing a large number of children being physically assaulted every day, a project was created to protect and prohibit educational spanking and any other type of physical correction or cruel treatment.
The Law 13010/14 of the Children and Adolescents recently approved by the Senate aims to punish parents or guardians who use physical force to educate their children to suffer warning, undergo orientation courses and undergo counseling. Many senators opposed the law, believing that parents will be vulnerable to false accusations and accusations, obligatorily paying for an unsubstantiated error.
The discussion extends to the population, dividing opinions and views already formed. Questions abouthow to raise a child without being able to slap when necessary is quite common when it comes to the subject, since in certain situations such as a child touching the plug or climbing a window, they would not be solved with a simple “you can’t do that”. But does spanking solve it? Will the child understand why he cannot do this again? Only 4% of the interviewed parents believe that their children will learn. 69% consider it a tool used occasionally when other attempts to impose the will have failed as a last resort. For one in four mothers and fathers, spanking does not educate, injure and cannot be any solution.
Child behavior experts claim that the conversation and explanation of the mistake made is much more valid than a slap or spanking. The psychologist Super Nanny advises the “ corner of discipline” method , where the child should be placed in a space reserved for them to think about what they did wrong, but not all parents see benefits in this method believing that the child only tends to stay even more nervous in the time you should think.
The bill was approved on June 4, 2014 by the Senate and is currently awaiting the president’s signature for release, but much is already being said about rights and punishments. Many still fight and eagerly await the vigor of the law and many others remain angry and unhappy with a law that completely removes the parents’ powers and rights to educate.
See also: Child Violence – Destroying Dreams
My name is Dr. Alexis Hart I am 38 years old, I am the mother of 3 beautiful children! Different ages, different phases 16 years, 12 years and 7 years. In love with motherhood since always, I found it difficult to make my dreams come true, and also some more after I was already a mother.
Since I imagined myself as a mother, in my thoughts everything seemed to be much easier and simpler than it really was, I expected to get pregnant as soon as I wished, but it wasn’t that simple. The first pregnancy was smooth, but my daughter’s birth was very troubled. Joana was born in 2002 with a weight of 2930kg and 45cm, from a very peaceful cesarean delivery but she had already been born with congenital pneumonia due to a broken bag not treated with antibiotics even before delivery.
