When pregnancy is very dreamed, we imagine everything happening naturally, the positive, the course and also the birth. We have a romantic vision, why not even say the poetics of motherhood and especially the moment of childbirth. However, when pregnancy is already a concrete reality and present in the woman’s life, the fear of childbirth can appear to spoil this beautiful moment.
Fear of childbirth can be accompanied by a lot of insecurity, nightmares and even panic attacks and anxieties in deeper cases. The reason? Fear of what could go wrong during childbirth. Fear of feeling pain, fear of not being able to deliver the baby you want, fear of something happening to the baby, fear of dying … Fear of the unknown manages to have the power to scare the woman.
Even knowing what may happen (at least have an idea of the procedure), fear still exists, for second-time moms the fear of childbirth is less than the first time, but it will still be present. Despite knowing that the moment is one of joy and happiness for bringing greater love to a person’s life, fearing setbacks is normal. However, if the fear of childbirth is bothering you to bring thoughts only about bad events, the pregnant woman may have a big problem on her hands. Let’s say that fear is normal, but the one that prevents you from doing the normal everyday things, is not healthy. A recent study showed that women with exaggerated fear of childbirth can develop postpartum depression, so the sooner she can treat this fear disorder the better.
But how to prevent this fear from taking hold of the moment? Is there a secret to enjoying the pregnancy without the insecurity that something bad is going to happen to hinder the progress of the pregnancy and even on the day of delivery ?
How to Deal with Fear of Childbirth?
The greatest weapon that a person can have against some kind of fear of a new situation is knowledge. Therefore, talking about your fears with the doctor is very important . See how the procedures will be performed, both for normal delivery and for cesarean deliveries or any other type of procedure done before or after birth. Taking doubts about anesthesia, talking about what you may or may not feel and also about postpartum events, will make you feel safer and will certainly reduce the fear of childbirth.
I remember that when I was young and I didn’t know anything about childbirth, I didn’t see myself in a difficult delivery, but the fear was there. Fear of what could happen, how it would be, if I could cope… Although the delivery was good, I did not feel pain and it was quite calm during the procedure, the second time, I really confess that fear took over me. Even though I knew what was to come, in a way I worried about several things:
Fear of dying: as I had a caesarean delivery, I felt some normal discomfort from anesthesia. Those who made me think twice about having another birth as the first, although it was good. The shortness of breath I felt after applying the anesthesia does not leave my head. The trauma of the early birth of my first daughter was also around me. Fear of the ruptured pouch happening again and delivery being in a hurry as before.
Fear of cuts: I felt capable of being a mother, but the fear of childbirth also brought me another inconvenience, fear of not being able to cope at the time H. The birth itself is very beautiful, but for those who do invasive procedures such as cesarean, yes additional fear. Final, there are 7 layers of cut. Would the recovery be good? Would he have any type of allergy or medication problem? Anyway, there were so many things to think about …
How did I resolve these fears? Exactly talking to a doctor who referred me to a psychologist . This period was very intense in my life, I confess that I felt fragile and vulnerable to future events and if I had not had professional help, I would not have been able to reach the moment of delivery with the tranquility that I had. Exposing my fears to the doctor, to the psychologist did me a lot of good. They made me see that fear is normal for human beings, but in everything that we are going to do, we cannot let ourselves be given to him. I learned that fear is an important factor in a person’s life, but we must not let it be a limiting element. Living life with fear, living the moment of pregnancy with fear, takes away all the beauty!Remember that you are generating a new life, and that the baby feels everything we are feeling . Passing security to him and everyone around him is very important.
Listening to what others have to say is also important, but we have to filter what is or is not good for us. There is always that distant aunt who comes to tell me that a neighbor of her aunt’s friend who died in childbirth, or that so-and-so had problems with normal childbirth, or that she had to open the surgery again for some infection. Bad things can happen, but we have to focus our energies on the best possible ones and delete those comments. We must know that everything that other people go through is fatal and that each case is one.
I needed to feel my skin in order to have a little help and be happier in the most incredible moment of my life. I recommend that you expose to your doctor what is bothering you, talk to nice people about their delivery, read reports on legal sites like Changing Diapers rs. This will certainly bring you greater tranquility to face the fear of childbirth. Remember that we are all made of flesh and bone and a fear is natural . Just don’t let him take charge of your life, if you feel like you’re getting in the way, ask for help, it’s no shame.
My name is Dr. Alexis Hart I am 38 years old, I am the mother of 3 beautiful children! Different ages, different phases 16 years, 12 years and 7 years. In love with motherhood since always, I found it difficult to make my dreams come true, and also some more after I was already a mother.
Since I imagined myself as a mother, in my thoughts everything seemed to be much easier and simpler than it really was, I expected to get pregnant as soon as I wished, but it wasn’t that simple. The first pregnancy was smooth, but my daughter’s birth was very troubled. Joana was born in 2002 with a weight of 2930kg and 45cm, from a very peaceful cesarean delivery but she had already been born with congenital pneumonia due to a broken bag not treated with antibiotics even before delivery.